I’ve got 5 more classes left on my Bikram yoga pass and I’ve been fighting and fighting and fighting with myself, with what I want, with what I can do and how to fit everything in but I’ve come to the decision that this is the end. For now.
I took my first class in 2009 in Leicester with my husband and I have been an addict ever since. On our first class, we put our mats right next to the mirrors as we thought that was the back of the class! After getting used to the shock of the heat, I remember feeling at peace and being so calm with the first breathing exercise and then being able to continue with the rest of the class so well. I’ve had two breaks since 2009, when I had both my daughters. Before then, we had been trying for children but had been unsuccessful. However, within 3 months of starting Bikram yoga I became pregnant. Coincidence? Maybe? But I am convinced that there is some good in Bikram yoga that no other form of exercise I have done has.
This September, after doing yoga for the longest stint yet of 2 years, I’m going to have to take a big break when my oldest daughter starts school. Maybe if I was so dedicated I could find time but with the school runs, the early morning yoga is out and evening yoga depends a lot on work. After having my second daughter I suffered a lot from backaches and just general aches. The backaches still comes and goes but definitely feels better after Bikram yoga. The general aches have more or less disappeared. The peace I felt in my first classes is elusive but I do feel a lot calmer and happier after a class even if it’s for a short time.
Yoga in general has always been a big part of my life and I do intend to carry on with yoga at home. But for now and to all the Bikram yogis:
“That stress you’ve placed upon your shoulders is going to crush you. Get rid of it. You don’t need to be perfect. You don’t need to have it all together. You don’t need to please everyone. Place that heavy burden on the ground. Throw it out into the sea. Expel it from your being. You will be lighter in mind, body and soul. You have to learn to say no without feeling guilty. Setting boundaries is healthy. You need to learn to respect and take care of yourself.” – Unknown